So there is this bitch in my life who visits me every month for a week, occasionally without warning and at totally inappropriate times. She is a LOT to put up with. Stupid bitch. You get me, right?
Sometimes I wish I had a cat. But I know I never will because I cannot be trusted enough to take good care of it. Probably the cat would have to take care of me. Anyway if I had a cat, I would name it Cat. Because...eff you, that's why. Anyway, the following piece of crap is completely fictitious, so please don't sue me for animal cruelty or whatever.
